2004-09-08 - 7:39 p.m.
Randomly all day i have been wiping tears from my eyes. I dont know why, i cant put my finger on an exact reason. I just dont know what to do, so here is my rant, and i swear itll be the last time i speak of it. What did i do? maybe the question is what i didnt do? i dont know. but i know i dont deserve this, whatever you can even call this. Time spent, wasted. Its gone and i cant ever get it back. so many changes...all for what? i dont care what people say about well if you had fun in the process then it was worth it. Not to me. Right now sucks. Temporary maybe, but reality bites. Seemingly its time for me to grow up. Everything seems to be making me. I dont like responsibility, i can barely handle myself as it is. So i will cry silently about this. Ill write what i feel down, and ill put on a happy face. No one knows what this is about, not one, and its because theres nothing any of you can do to help. Ive gotta grow up, right now, theres just not an option. The time has come. i cant do this again, i wont do it again. i will not let it happen. part of growing up is thinking for myself, and im doing it. Ill have to see the signs, heed the warnings, because i just cant do this again. Its over, and for now im doing my best every day. So if i dont have that sparkle in my eye, or that jump in my step, dont worry ill be fine. If in passing i dont seem all that friendly, dont worry, it has nothing to do with you, just know that ill be okay. Ive said im doing it, so many times i cant even count, i guess i better start meaning it. Its time to let go
Dreams really do come true - 2005-02-07
The war - 2005-02-03
Broken - 2005-01-30
Saved Night - 2005-01-28
Best Poem - 2005-01-26
